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  • Aug 01

    We both know the funniest thing you saw today were these Renaissance GIFs

    You guys. A Montreal artist named Scorpion Dagger is making digital collages out from early and Northern Renaissance paintings. That's all there is to know ... except that they're fucking hilarious. The juxtaposition between 15th century characters and modern situations would be funny enough to earn whoever made them a day more on earth without being beheaded. So please, laugh away your sorrows with these tiny modern works of art.


  • Aug 01

    Daily Viral: Here's a glorious instructional video on how to have cybersex in 1997

    Do you guys remember cybersex? You had to log into your parent's AOL account, and you'd go into a chat room with a name like FoXxXy_69_Secretz, and hope you'd be talking to a super hot 13-year old from your middle school, but really it was a 54-year old woman in Arkansas? No? Well, this video will definitely bring back the nostalgia of '90s internet sex if that description didn't ...

     


  • Aug 01

    Learn the art of shot layering, it's not like you have plans

    Layering shots is an art form that is easy to master, but most importantly it’s extremely impressive and makes you the godfather of cocktails for the night. All you need is a spoon and a steady hand to unleash greatness, and before you know it you’ll be creating shots awe-inspiring someone will name their kid after you. 


  • Aug 01

    Peaches with underwear on are being sold as delicious sexy butts

    That's one way to get you to eat more fruit. Stupid, sexy fruit. Ingeniously called "Ripe Fruit," the peaches are being sold as a novelty gift to promote China's Qixi Festival. They're the brainchild of a fruit vendor in Nanjing, and each pair of delicious cotton underwear is slipped on by the hands of someone who cares about both youro nutrition and arousal.


  • Aug 01

    Boulder bandit leads police on thrilling chase in stolen garbage truck

    You never really think of someone aspiring to drive a garbage truck, but yesterday, that notion was put to the test when a man wanted to drive one so badly that he stole one from its scheduled route and lead the police on a dramatic chase down U.S. 36. We can only assume his motivation was the hasty and proper disposal of our community's waste.


  • Jul 31

    Here's where you can eat the most fattening meal in America

    You usually don't go to the Cheesecake Factory when you're trying to lose weight ... but if you're trying to gain massive quantities of it for a movie role as a boulder or something, there's no better place to go. That's because it just won the Center for Science in the Public Interests' Xtreme Eating Awards for most calorically-dense, six-pack destroying restaurant in our fine country.


  • Jul 31

    Music News: Can you tell that David Guetta is tripping balls onstage?

    We hate to deflower your virgin ears, but sometimes, EDM DJs do drugs. And sometimes, if you're David Guetta, those drugs kick in the middle of your set at Belgium's Tomorrowland in front of tens of thousands of people ... an event he couldn't quite conceal when he stopped DJing, and stared straight into his own soul.