'Isis Harambe' is this lucky woman's honest to god real name

'Isis Harambe' is this lucky woman's honest to god real name

CultureApril 14, 2017 By Brian Frederick

Dear Internet, 

Here's the thing: The world is crazy, like off-its-rocker Looney Tune gone wild type of crazy. Yet sometimes, amongst the unending chaos and despair blooms a beautiful story that could only have come from the ancient cosmos — or more specifically, the alignment of everything lit done to awaken one of the greatest stories to ever come of the 21st Century. 

We give you, Isis Harambe Spjut, a fortunately named woman who is probably going to be much more famous in the coming weeks.

“I trip out with my name constantly,” Isis told The Daily Dot recently. “Like, when I meet people [and] I tell them my name, they’re, ‘That’s crazy, that’s funny.’ I’m literally like, ‘No, that is the craziest name you’ve ever heard in your life.’ I really have the most unique name in the world. Pretty trippy.”

She claims to have gotten the moniker by her parents, two self-admitted Rastafarians. 'Isis' — a Bob Dylan song and an Egyptian goddess — was chosen by her mother. 'Harambe' — meaning 'harmony' in Swahili — was chosen by her father. This, of course, was decades ago.

Naturally, the Internet screamed foul at the possibility. The Daily Dot brilliantly maintained hater-control, however, and checked with the California DMV where the ID was issued. The department confirmed that it's all real and she'd likely have to provide a birth certificate to obtain the card. Isis insists she wouldn't have changed her name just for a few moments of online notoriety either.

“I’m not the type of person to do something for attention,” says Isis Harambe. “I don’t know if they believe me, but who changes their name? People who go through that much effort just to get attention, I’m not down with that.”

Bless the Internet, and bless every single one of you.