Wine comes in big-ass 40s now, so there's that
Are you a classy motherfucker but also love to get back-alley wasted while looking really, really cool doing it? You could go after a Schlitz or Old English, sure, but malt liquor is a thing of the past, poured out decades ago in respect for all the lost homies (RIP Pac). So what to do this summer, you ask?
Get on the 40 oz. wine train, produced exclusively at Forty Ounce Wines.
Currently available in both rosé and Muscadet, the massive container looks to be this season's hottest consumable of 2017.
According to Delish, the big-ass bottles of wine are available in New York, Pennsylvania, New Jersey, California and Colorado only, and will likely go fast considering not a ton of them were made last year due to climate conditions in the Loire Valley.
But at $16 a pop for almost twice as much booze as a standard bottle of wine, it's a damn good price to stock up if you get the opportunity and have the liver to show for it.
God bless America.