We're going to protect your drunk ass from getting a DUI this weekend

We're going to protect your drunk ass from getting a DUI this weekend

... sponsored by Breckenridge Brewery's safe-ride initiative.

VicesJuly 15, 2015 By Brian Frederick

We needn’t add ourselves to the long list of people, places and things harping on others about the dangers and general stupidity of drinking and driving. The lot of us are (at least physically) adults and can make rational decisions based off of a biblioteca’s worth of informative reasons out there why not to engage in such reckless behavior. So we’ll cut the shit.

But we’re also human and often make mistakes. Let’s not do that this weekend (or any weekend, but especially this weekend), because the Breckenridge Brewery is finally opening its massive new complex down south and is throwing a pig roasting, music listening and beer drinking rager to celebrate. That’s why we’ve teamed up with the iconic brewery — along with Zeal Optics and Bus To Show — to bring a safe ride alternative from Boulder to Littleton.

The Hootenanny safe ride, as the blatant name suggests, is a way to get from point A to point B and get point blurry in between without worrying about driving, evading or any of the other stupidity that gets us into a world of hurt. Tickets for the bus and the event can be found via Breck’s Hootenanny site and are available up until departure time.

With that, we dug up some relatively obscure bullet points related to drinking and driving in this state to try and scare the bejesus out of everyone into making the right decision this weekend. And if the threat of jail time, a lost drivers license, thousands of dollars in fees and overall disdain from society doesn’t entice you to jump on our bus — maybe the prospect of FREE BEER and ENTERTAINMENT will?!

RELATED: Leftover Salmon has some career advice for all of you young whippersnappers

It's not just DUI scary, Coloradans can also pop a DWAI ...

because there are two levels of impairment and the threshold for getting into trouble with either is minimal. Like, close to half a beer minimal — what fun is that?

To cop papers for a DUI (Driving Under The Influence) a person's BAC must be over 0.08 percent — but anyone can catch a DWAI (Driving While Ability Impaired) with only a 0.05 percent BAC. And remember, craft beers generally carry a higher alcohol content percentage than macro brewers' yellow swill.

"Driving" isn't even fully defined in the Colorado statutes.

You don’t necessarily have to be physically “driving” to grab a quick ride to the clink. “Driving” isn’t specifically defined in the Colorado law and is openly left up to the jury (if it ends up going to trial). According to a blog written by Colorado Criminal Defense Specialist, H. Michael Steinberg, if a car is inoperable or broken down, driven on private or public roadways, or even if the keys are in the ignition or not, has little to no bearing on prosecution. If you’re in the car with the keys in proximity and tanked, a-charge-is-a-coming.

This kind of thing follows you around for. ev. er.

“For certain kinds of offenses such as sexual offenses and traffic offenses – even a complete dismissal of the case will not make the case eligible to be sealed – expunged,” says Steinberg. Even though a DUI is a traffic offense and not a criminal one (unless it's your fourth offense ... then you're a felon in CO ... and also need help), they still haunt a person's every move. Anyone checking backgrounds (school, jobs, lover's parents) will inevitably find it. And let’s be honest, that’s just fucking embarrassing …

Not drinking? There's a law for that!

Hauling around your social-circle drunk and feel it’s ok to let them in the car with an open bottle of Fireball in tow? Open container laws are a real thing and will get a driver busted even if he or she had nothing to drink. “Under the law – a container need not be totally ‘open,’” says Steinberg. “An example? A previously opened bottle of alcohol such as resealed wine cannot be forward of the trunk area in a car. No one in a vehicle may have an open alcohol container.”

And with the newness of cannabis being legalized in this state, the laws are slow to catch up with defining particular areas of the legalese. Sealed containers need to be just that: sealed. And not like, “hey I screwed on the mason jar lid tight” kind of sealed — like dispensary sealed … from a dispensary … and unopened.

So while there will be thousands of other asshats making bad judgment calls on the road this weekend, don’t be one of them. Save all of those moral and ethical hangovers for Sunday morning when you look back at your texting history …

- source CDOT